In therapy, one of the most tenacious foes I face is helping someone realize they're wrong. Most people that come into my office are just dead wrong! About what? About what they believe about their future. And boy are they certain that they have it all figured out! "Nothing will ever go right for me; no matter what I do, I'll never be okay; I'll never find the right person; I'll always struggle…be alone…a screw-up, ..."
Read MoreBreathing exercises don't work for everyone. This is more of a tip that turns into a trick, later. Years ago, after about 10 emergency room visits for anxiety attacks, one of the ER docs recommended that I try some deep breathing exercises. Well, I did. For about a minute. Until the concentrated focus on my breathing became the bigger issue…
Read MoreTruth be told, I'm not completely free of anxiety myself. There are times during performing therapy, for instance, that the "what if's" come to me like an eagle swooping down to claw up its prey. "What if I panic and have to leave the room?" or "what if I go blank and can't think of anything to say?" Yes, I still experience anxiety on occasion. One of the reasons: toxic anxiety can be a bully!
Read MoreWe know that avoiding anxiety fuels it and that facing it increases healing. What are the ways we subtly avoid facing anxiety and what can we do about it?
Read MoreAnxiety makes a bad boss. Another way anxiety steps outside of its boundaries as the protector is by grabbing the wheel of your life from you and acting as if it's Mr. T (the boss). We all have several emotions to pick from at any given moment. Anxiety, when it becomes toxic, knocks you over the head with a bottle and overthrows your mind…
Read MoreAs a therapist, I frequently work with adults who are struggling to cope with the ashes of childhood sexual, physical or emotional betrayal. A lot of times, from a parent. One of the more challenging aspects of this work is aiding in untwisting the knots parents have tied in their children's lives through abuse…
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